Leaving Vegas on a Saturday wasn’t exactly my cup of tea, so getting retardedly drunk before heading back sounded pretty harmless. While I was sitting in the back seat of my friend’s car, she turned around and suggested we climb to the top of a mountain to watch the sun. Did I mention she’s crazy? Next thing I know we pull over, jet across the highway, and leave behind another drunk girl passed out in the car. Next, we see barbed wire in front of us after a good distance of walking. I’m thinking.. THANK GOD. Instead of turning around like any normal person would, she decides to lift me over the wires and then hop over. Next thing I know my friend starts running like the wind! I yelled for her to stop and she screamed to me something about missing the sun. Well stupid drunk me thought she had said RUN! I take off in my sandals thinking I’m being chased by a moose or something. About twelve cacti in my feet and two snakes later, I freak out and realize this mountain was like the freakin Everest, and you have to go through a shit load of hills and desert to even get there. Why was she running!? What was she running from!? ..So many thoughts going through my head. I get back to the barbed wire and wait for my friend to come. One hour later, the suns not up, the clouds roll in, and my friend is nowhere in sight.

The more I sat and thought the more I worried and thought my friend would have been back by then and something had happened. Since I have anxiety, I started shaking and crying and immediately grew some balls to try to get over the barbed wire by myself so I could call the police. Turns out I ended up ripping myself a new asshole. Not only did I scrape and bruise my entire body from attempting this stunt, but I somehow managed to get a deep bloody cut going from the back of my thigh to my asshole from before falling over backwards onto a cactus. I get up, run across the highway to the car, and call 911. My passed out friend woke up to me screaming and crying, looking like I just had been through WWII, and calling the cops because our friend is lost in the desert being chased. Twenty minutes later the both of us girls are drunk and crying, and finally we see our friend crossing the highway in perfect condition. Best part of the story is that I thought it was seven in the morning. It was seven at NIGHT and she started running because she didn’t want to miss the sun SET on the mountain…HOLY HANGOVER